SoftBank 2026 AGM [pdf]

I love how in the slide with "It was the goose that created value", the goose has its wings raised. The goose is ... triumphant. Ascendant. Its arc is complete: after being valued at $0, the goose is recognized for the inexhaustible source of value it is. The goose is vindicated.

And finally, in the denouement, we see the goose in serene repose. "It is the Goose itself," we are told, in bold, confident lettering. This is what matters. Not the eggs.

I hope lasagnacat can come back, do a special on this, and hire John Barrymore for the narration, as a spiritual sequel to their Pipe Strip video (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NAh9oLs67Cw).

Back in 2014, Son also gave me a good laugh with a slide comparing:

> Von Neumann computer: powered by programming vs. Personal robot: powered by family happiness. https://i.gzn.jp/img/2014/06/05/softbank-conference/snap3014...

His sense of humor has only reached new heights since then.

If your reaction is 'What the Hell is this?', read this for background:

* https://reuters.com/business/media-telecom/talk-bubble-is-an...

Then notice that the metal construction robot needs toe protectors on its boots.

Then notice that the slides have small print.

The only thing I got from the presentation is that I still underrate geese, gotta put some respect on their feathered name.

This makes me feel like a spend too much time on slides for my rinky dink enterprise software feature projects.

Pure trolling as a strategy...

Golden quotes:

"It was the goose that created value: 74 - 3 = 71"[0]

"Golden Egg factory inside the goose"[1]

0: see page 49

1: see page 55

Original approach for their annual shareholder decks. I liek that.

Surreal

When slop meets stock photos